Who really gets better?
“We can also use the steps to improve our attitudes. Our best thinking got us into
trouble. We recognize the need for change.”
Basic Text, p. 53
When new in recovery, most of us had at least one person we just couldn’t stand.
We thought that person was the rudest, most obnoxious person in the program. We
knew there was something we could do, some principle of recovery we could practice
to get over the way we felt about this person but what? We asked our sponsor for
guidance. We were probably assured, with an amused smile, that if we just kept
coming back, we’d see the person get better. That made sense to us. We believed
that the steps of NA worked in the lives of everyone. If they could work for us, they
could work for this horrible person, too.
Time passed, and at some point we noticed that the person didn’t seem as rude or
obnoxious as before. In fact, he or she had become downright tolerable, maybe even
likeable. We got a pleasant jolt as we realized who had really gotten better. Because
we had kept coming back, because we had kept working the steps, our perception of
this person had changed. The person who’d plagued us had become “tolerable”
because we’d developed some tolerance; he or she had become “likeable” because
we’d developed the ability to love.
So who really gets better? We do! As we practice the program, we gain a whole new
outlook on those around us by gaining a new outlook on ourselves.
Just for today: As I get better, so will others. Today, I will practice tolerance and try
to love those I meet.